#thisiscoercivecontrol

You can share your own experience of coercive control or domestic abuse anonymously here on this site.

This site is inspired by viewers of Open Clasp Theatre Company’s play ‘Rattle Snake’.

It is based on real life stories of women who have faced and survived coercive controlling domestic abuse.

The women had been silenced, not believed or legally gagged. This play gives them a voice.

We want this site to give you a voice.

Share your own experience of coercive control or domestic abuse anonymously here. Your story will stand alongside others.

Scroll down for information about staying safe online and support.

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3 entries.
Anon
I was in 2 abusive relationships, the 2nd being coercive on so many levels. I was convinced that I deserved to be treated that way, I defended them, made excuses for them......
Even now, over 15 years since the last one finished there are times that they might as well be alongside me. Sometimes things just run too deep.
There are days which is an uphill battle to outrun them but I am determined to not let them win.....
Anon
I have for the past six months tried to help my ex partner who has been in an abusive ,coercive relationship .She has been held prisoner ,battered,verbally abused and stalked all in the past six months .I have witnessed this and tried to help but around a month ago she invited this woman back into her home again .
I don’t know what else to do .She doesn’t see the danger she and her daughter are in .It saddens me that she doesn’t feel strong enough to walk away despite all the help she has right beside her .I am at a loss as to what to do .
This woman has used every manipulative technique she can and displayed behavior that is truly horrific,obsessive and bordering on dangerous.

It’s sad to watch somebody in the clutches of this type of behavior and nothing anyone’s says will work .
Anon
I watched a much loved family member suffer for years as the result of an abusive and controlling relationship. She never recovered. She found the strength to leave him. He continued to use children, police and the community against her. She was left with nothing in the end. She died too young. He made sure she didn’t have guardianship of her son. He continued to be ‘there’ in our small community. In the pub, at the school, in our lives. The trauma she lived with was too great. Services all treated her as if she had a mental illness. She was committed. She was set up in sheltered accommodation. She was treated as ‘drunk’ and ‘mad’. She was my friend. The child that survives her carries the trauma of losing a mother, of having no justice and continues to be prey for that man. He has gone on to have 3 more relationships and 3 more children. The community know what he is. How do family members who have watched someone be destroyed like that carry on?

“Working with Open Clasp has been, life changing, empowering and has given me a voice when mine had been taken. I now have hope for the future and a voice and know I am protected for that voice by an amazing company changing the world one play at a time.”

Support

For information on keeping yourself safe online, please visit the Women’s Aid information page.

National Domestic Violence Helpline
24 hour support service for women.
0800 200247

Karma Nirvana
A UK charity that supports victims and survivors of forced marriage and Honour Based Abuse.
0800 5999247

Freephone Rape Crisis England & Wales
Provides support and services for women & girls who’ve experienced sexual violence.
0800 8029999

Galop
LGBT+ anti-violence charity.
o800 9995428

Childline
Free, confidential support service for under 19 year olds.
0800 1111